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Autobiography in Five Short Chapters. A poem by Portia Nelson

Autobiography in Five Short Chapters by Portia Nelson: the stages of learning

I

I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I fall in. I am lost. I am helpless.
It isn’t my fault.
It takes forever to find a way out.

II

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I still don’t see it. I fall in again.
I can’t believe I am in the same place.
It isn’t my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.

III

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it there, I still fall in.
It’s habit. It’s my fault. I know where I am.
I get out immediately.
You’re overwhelmed by pain, rage or shut-down.

IV

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.

V

I walk down a different street.

“I have come to the frightening conclusion that I am the decisive element. It is my personal approach that creates the climate. It is my daily mood that makes the weather. I possess tremendous power to make life miserable or joyous. I can be a tool of torture or an instrument of inspiration, I can humiliate or humour, hurt or heal. In all situations, it is my response that decides whether a crisis is escalated or deescalated, and a person is humanized or dehumanised. If we treat people as they are, we make them worse. If we treat people as they ought to be, we help them become what they are capable of becoming.”

– Goethe

“Working with Andrew was an incredibly deep, profound and life changing experience. I went to Andrew thinking I needed to be cured of loving the love of my life – thankfully this didn’t happen. I cannot thank or recommend Andrew highly enough – the changes that can occur when working with Andrew truly are magic! ”

Ali Lees, Google review

“We started seeing Andrew during a very difficult time, and without his help we would have split up. We both found Andrew’s sessions really helpful and it gave us the insight and tools to iron out the issues that were causing the most problems. Things between us are now really good and we are once again planning a future together.”

Couple who wish anonymity

“I have made some incredible progress and I am now in an intimate and happy relationship thanks to your help.”

Client who requests anonymity.

“Andrew is a highly experienced therapist who works with a number of different techniques, some unusual and unexpected (but in a good way!) that get to the heart of your issues quickly. He works gently and safely and I felt held in a safe space throughout the session. I would recommend Andrew to anyone looking for help in dealing with life’s questions. ”

Client who requests anonymity.

“ Andrew is an amazing human being! We had a few very useful sessions. He is totally and genuinely committed to helping people. … Thank you Andrew! ”

Pedro Da Silva, Google review

“… I had experienced a lot of trauma in my childhood that I had not been able to fully deal with my whole adult life. I had 10 sessions with Andrew and now I am no longer triggered as I had always been by certain situations and interactions. I can love myself finally and this has completely changed my romantic relationships and my career! So many of my friends want to see Andrew now after seeing this dramatic, positive change within me! ”

Kay Dent, Google review

“I am finally comfortable with myself and at peace with past experiences. I highly recommend Andrew. He is a true soul healer. ”

Mal Szwarc, Google review

“Had a massive effect on my relationship. Learned loads of really good stuff – surpassed my expectations. [Andrew was] brilliant – a complete star! Emma C ♥♥♥ A very good course. It has changed how I relate. Helen D ♥♥♥ [Andrew had some] … profound insights into relationships … explained clearly. Natasha M ♥♥♥ Met needs I didn’t know I had! I loved the fast-track approach to raising self-esteem … [I had] “eureka” and “lights being switched on” moments. Fiona M. ♥♥♥ Very profound, enriching unravelling of the complexities of relationships. Really enlightening exercises. [Name withheld] ”

Feedback from the last relationship workshop I ran in Bristol.

“[Couples clients] Cannot recommend Andrew enough. The most attentive, insightful, astute & compassionate therapist. The difference in our relationship – how we communicate, how we understand & relate to one another, how we’re able to support one another – is absolutely massive, & yet it feels like we’ve only had to make tiny tweaks to get there. Andrew is incredible at facilitating a safe, supportive place, making it surprisingly easy to be truly open & honest & to therefore get the most out of the sessions. Thank you for everything, this therapy has been life changing. ”

Naomi Kent, Google review

“Andrew is one of the best therapists I have ever worked with. He really listens. I feel deeply heard and understood in his sessions and have the space to discover ‘the answers’ for myself. The questions he asks and the comments he does offer are well thought-out and illuminating. I feel he is really there for me and I always experience a big shift in my understanding afterwards. If you want to make a breakthrough with an issue in your life or simply want to be heard, I highly recommend him. Jenny, massage therapist, Bristol. ”

Jenny, massage therapist, Bristol.

“I’ve had many therapists over the years, and Andrew has been the most significant to date. He helped me see my life more clearly, he lifted a vale of confusion. I will forever be grateful to Andrew, and have recommended him to multiple people since working together. ”

Holly Smith, Google review

“Andrew is one of the best therapists I have ever worked with. If you want to make a breakthrough with an issue in your life or relationship, I highly recommend him.”

Jenny, Massage therapist, Bristol