Questions

This is broadly true for the clients who most typically come to see me. I rarely meet people who are so not-grown-up they habitually sleep around, or come from cultures where “mistresses” are normal, or many other things.

That said, one common pattern is that

Your kindness does you credit but no, anyone who wants an appointment needs to contact me directly.

Attachment theory is good but  I use a different system of understanding which covers the same ground in a different way, and much more. This is the body-based characterology originated by Wilhelm Reich and Alexander Lowen. A good popular book is The 5 Personality Patterns by Steven Kessler . I’ve been fortunate to have trained extensively with one of the world’s most experienced experts in this approach to understanding people, Moumina Jeffs. It’s extremely useful and it’s one of the pillars of how I work.

I put this question in quotes because everyone who asks knows this is unanswerable and no therapist could  ever say Yes.  What it actually means is: How normal am I? Are my problems normal ones for therapists? Are my issues permanently crippling, or are they too trivial to deserve help, do other people cope easily with worse things? Am I weird? We live in an isolating world. It’s easy to be so alone with our hurts and fears that we’ve no way to know such things.

Statistically,  most people who come to me do have the general range of issues that everyday therapists commonly work with  and to that extent I can give that re-assurance. If something is outside my experience or training I say so.

I don’t work with helping a couple to decide whether or not to have children. I don’t feel I can deal evenly and simultaneously both with the needs of each person as an individual, and with their dynamic as a couple.  I have considerable respect for other couples therapists who find the way to do this.