A relaxation technique
This is my version of “the relaxation response”, a simple way to bring calm into your day. It is a natural bodily mechanism, first scientifically studied by Dr Herbert Benson of Harvard Medical School. Practised regularly for 20 minutes a day, it can cut stress by a half or more over a few weeks.
This is a version of a good, famous, basic relaxation technique. The originator is Herbert Benson, and he has instructional videos on Youtube. Other videos show many variants.
You can do it any time of day, and sit or lie as you prefer. Obviously, don’t do this while driving a car or using machinery. You can set an alarm clock or come back when you like. It’s just like waking up in the morning or on the beach, you always come back and wake up fully within a few moments.
Twenty minutes is good, several or all days of the week. Longer if you like. Shorter – 5 minutes – can be VERY useful, sitting in the bus, or in your lunch break, or getting home from work in the evening. No need to do the whole exercise, just do steps 1 – 3 for 5 minutes.
There’s excellent research that doing this type of thing for 20 minutes (ish) every day (ish) over a couple of months this has major benefits. These range from reduced period pains and heart lower pressure to more self-confidence and increased cheerfulness.
1. Sit or lie comfortably. If your head is unsupported, find the position where it feels weightless.
2. Breathe easily:
Here are a couple of variations for the breathing; do whichever you prefer. I suggest to first try (a).
(a) This stress reduction based breathing is structured breathing.
Breathe in slowly through the nose to a count of 4, gently pause a moment, breathe out through the mouth to a count of 7, gently pause … and so on. Any count is OK – 3-6, 5-8 as long as the outbreath is onger.
If your breathing is at first fast, gradually slow down.
The counting is an assistance not a rigid structure. So if you for example have a big yawning breath, of course allow and enjoy that.
Notice that no matter how tense you are you can never, ever fail to breathe out or in. It can be very relaxing to realise you don’t have to do anything to breath in and out: it will always, always happen on its own without effort from you.
(b) The meditation based version of the breathing is simply to notice your breathing and allow it to be as it is and to relax on its own, making no effort to change it.
If your breathing starts off tense, stay with this stage until it starts to be more still, maybe 3 – 5 minutes.If your breathing starts off basically relaxed , move on to (3) as soon as you like.
3. Drop the counting, but continue to breathe in a calm enjoyable way. On each outbreath, say the word CALM, once, silently to yourself. In your mind’s eye picture CALM written in front of you. Imagine you are writing out the word CALM over and over again in a slow, soothing rhythm. Distinctly notice the size, shape and colour of the letters which is the most pleasurable and soothing. Distinctly notice the speed and rhythm you prefer – any speed you like. Distinctly focus on each and every letter as you write it.
You may write the whole word once for each time your say it, or write one letter each time you say the word, or two letters, or however feels most calming and peaceful.
Persist through any initial boredom or impatience – choose to ignore those. Make a decision to remain doing the exercise for the full time not matter what. A point will come where the mind clicks into the slower rate of mental speed of the subconscious mind. If your mind wanders, that’s OK, just come back to CALM when you can.
If you want to start with a different word than CALM, by all means do. Peace, silence, safe …
4. Continue this until you begin to feel a distinct beginning of relaxation. (30 – 50 slow breaths, or at first longer, maybe up to five minutes or possibly more. If enjoyable, you can count “calm 1, calm 2, calm 3 …”)
Then, feel through your body for “the place of peace” within you in this moment – the place where you most feel relaxed. That might be in one hand, both feet, your arms, a shoulder, the middle of your chest – anywhere.
Wait patiently for a few moments and allow a word to slowly float into your mind which puts into words the feeling in the place of peace. This may take quite a few seconds, be patient. The word might still be CALM, but equally could be different – relaxed, heavy, happy, tingling, warm, protected, joyful, light, peaceful, detached, peaceful – anything.
Both the body part and the sensation may be different, or the same, each time you do this.
5. Repeat step 3 with this new word, eg saying and seeing and writing out SAFE or RELAXED (for example, or whatever else.)
Focus your entire attention on the part of the body which feels good. Feel the feeling, concentrate on it, bring your mind back to that good feeling if it wanders.
6. Doing this only as a relaxation exercise, continue now for as long as you like.
If you get so relaxed that you can’t be bothered to do the exercise, that’s excellent, just sit or lie quietly for as long as your like.
To get the researched health benefits, do it for a minimum of twenty minutes daily (ish). More is excellent! – 40 minutes is a very good time, or an hour.
“Yesterday is the past. Tomorrow is the future. Today is a gift and that’s why we call it the present.”
– Anon